Alone?

I know I'm not alone spiritually and all that; my God is always with me. But at this specific moment in time, right now, I just feel secluded. I don't think it's such a big issue to be honest and I know everyone probably experiences times like this (I have become pretty in good in keeping my calm, as you must have noticed- there's ln point in making a big deal out of nothing); but it just feels really weird today; I just feel so out of myself today. 

I think this in part had to do with my desire for; not a boyfriend; just someone who I can share things with and who is on the same page as me spiritually, emotionally and mentally. Just someone who checks up on me once in a while you know- that feeling is nice. 

I have probably lost my desire to want to share real things with people; firstly because you realise at a point that not many people really care: hence the fact I have lost the point of twitter. Why should I spill my guts out to no one in particular; if people care, they would make an effort. 

I just hate being the one to always do so. I think I'm just going to let things fall.

I used to find so much joy in making people smile and just generally seeing people happy (i used to always feel way worse when my friends/people in General were sad compared to when I personally was sad). Now it just seems like people don't take you seriously anymore when you constantly joke around. 

I don't know. I don't just like this current feeling. I'm done. Forget this dumb emotions for now.